Here my vent begins.
But I am going to admit some things that have been happening around here. Please don't call the Social Services Department on me, but I have fallen asleep on the job a few times a day. Sunny could be playing with her lego's, I could be watching her, and the next minute, I am out. I have no idea how long I am asleep, but a few times when I have woken up, Sunny has been in her room playing.
I can't imagine what guilt I would feel if she got hurt or walked outside. This is scary stuff.
The TV is on most of the day for Sunny's entertainment. During that time, I drift in and out of consciousness.
People may ask if I go to bed at a descent hour. The answer is yes. I go to bed as soon as Sunny is asleep. This varies between 9:30 and 10 pm. Some days I am lucky because she goes to bed at 9 pm. Sunny hates to sleep.
When I do go to bed, I am awoken in the night by the constant need to pee. I go maybe once or twice in the night. Then my back hurts and I try to get comfortable. I am a back sleeper, and sleeping on the back is a huge no-no in pregnancy, mainly the 2nd trimester. So I just suffer with sleeping on my side, with lots of pillows between me and my legs.
Then Sunny comes into our room between 2-3 am. I have no idea why she wakes in the night, but as soon as she gets in bed next to me and feels my body next to hers, she is sound asleep. The problem is, I can't sleep like that.
Sleeping problems at night and just plain pregnancy haggardness and fatigue, I have found myself just a plain zombie.
Did I mention very sick. I have actually thrown up at the grocery store. This morning sickness lasts all day with me.
About 19- 20 weeks and on, is when I start feeling normal and super great, as was last time. I am almost there.
My hygiene is embarrassing. I hardly do my hair, no makeup, lounge clothes all day and in public. All part of being an official zombie.
Rodney is so great about helping me out. He works 40 hours a week and he goes to school full time, so I hate asking him to watch Sunny all the time. He often does though because he is just that great.
I have found my greatest strength to be God. The Lord has given me amazing strength in the past when Sunny was sick as a infant, and I know he can help me gain strength during this pregnancy. All I need to do is ask. The Lord understands each of us and our needs. This is just the season of life I am in right now. I know my energy will return in about a month. I miss that energy.
Picture source: thedailymail.UK.